The latest App. (Disclaimer: This App does not in fact exist… yet?)

I just had an interesting “altercation” (probably the wrong word) with some stranger not even a half hour ago… upon writing this, that is. I was talking to somebody outside of a supermarket. At the corner of my eye I see a girl who catches my attention. She was wearing trainers and looked like she just came out of a gym. No make up but she still looked good. I didn’t like her eyebrows to be picky but with a body like hers who’s complaining. (Sorry for alienating all my female readers right about now but if you hang in there you might like the point I’m trying to make.)

So where was I? Oh, yeah I was being a shallow pig. So I notice she took a seat on a near by bench. Now usually I would gawk at her as descreatly as possible and just walk on by, maybe even try to shoot her a smile. But I was feeling frisky today.

“Hi, What’s your name?” I politely ask.

“Why do you wanna know?” She replies defencively.

“Well, it’s kind of a small town and I don’t recognise you. I just thought it’d be nice meet someone new!” I say as upbeat and as inocently as possible.

I know she was thinking that I was thinking about getting her naked but truth is I was thinking about trying to have decient conversation with an attractive stranger. Period.

“My name’s Fillip.” I say as I offer my hand in a friendly handshake. Instinctively she shakes my hand and replies, “Nadia.”

Immediately some guy rides up on his bike beside me. It all happened so fast. It’s obvious now that she has been waiting for this guy. Without hesitating I introduced myself to the newcomer. Equal rights and all.

“Hi I’m Fillip.” I say.

“Who are you?” He says imediately, obviously uncomfortable with me being there.

“Fillip.” I repeat. “I was just telling her that I didn’t recognise her and it’s a small town and that it’s nice to… uh, meet new people.” Behind me in the parkinglot a woman just happens to park her car. The guy knows her. He cut’s me out by saying hi to the woman from the car and carries on a conversation.

Feeling utterly fased out of the social situation I put my tail between my legs and say goodbye and leave. =(

I’m not happy with how that went down, but then I remember my DO OVER App. I pull out my iPhone and with the press of I button I’m back a couple of minutes in time. The guy pulls up just like before.

“Oh, is this your little brother?” I ask in attempt to emasculate him. “What did you say?” He seems angry. But she kinda giggles and replies, “No, he’s my boyfriend.” She smiles.

“Oops, Hehe.. I guess I just assumed. You know the old saying, Assuming (I turn to look at the guy for the joke to land)  makes an ass out of you…” then I pause as if you think of what comes next. “..and me.” The douche adds.

I turn to look her in the eyes and remark casually,”That’s what I said.” Nadia gets it and chuckles breifly. The woman who parked her car goes by unnoticed this time and I decide to bow out gracefully.

“Well it’s been fun, but it’s time I leave you kids alone. See ya around Nadia.” I say as I make my leave. I can feel her eyes on my back. It feels warm unlike the icy glare from what’s-his-face.

In the end it’s not about how many girls you hook up with, or even getting the number. Heck it’s not even about humiliating the alpha-male jerk hole. It’s about confidently standing your ground in social situations. Some people lose sleep over this sort of thing and it’s important that everyone who’s ever felt like that to look back and say it ain’t that serious. Next time when you dare to say something dare to take control of the conversation. who knows it might lead you to where you want to be.

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